Chapter 23
“I’m sorry for just turning up like this.”
“Mother remembers when we were friends, Anne. This is strange, but she’ll work through it.” Celeste studied Anne. “What happened?”
“Dante convince Cornelius to talk to me about the ritual, which was complicated enough, and then he kissed me.”
“He what?”
Anne shook her head. “From the way he spoke it’s something he’s thought about before. With the ritual so close he saw it as his last chance.”
“Obviously he doesn’t know about Jonathan.”
“Would it have stopped him if he did?”
“You think he’d still have done it?”
“Possibly. It was surreal.”
“Cornelius knows about your soulmate?”
“Yes, he does, and that…”
“Even if he didn’t…” Celeste studied Anne. “How are you feeling about it?”
“Last night I barely slept. All I kept doing was going over it all in my head, trying to understand why.”
“Since Jonathan left Cornelius and Natalie have had problems.”
“That still doesn’t explain it, Celly. Cornelius was Father’s friend. Kissing me… I’m far too young for him.”
“Are you?”
“Physically, yes, and the rest… I’m not even going to think about it right now. Until yesterday he didn’t know I’d lived multiple lifetimes, but he’d still thought about it.”
“Nothing I say will make this any easier, Anne, but I’m willing to listen. Why it happened doesn’t really matter. Cornelius, for his own reasons, is interested in you, and last night he chose to show you, in the belief he’d be dead soon. It makes me think he doesn’t expect anything more.”
“Even if he did it’s not as though I can change anything. Titus has made his decision, and the ritual is happening. Cornelius believes he doesn’t deserve a second chance, due to who he was before Jonathan, so he’s not going to walk away, whatever argument I might come up with.”
“You care?”
“I care more than I should, considering my soulmate.”
“We both know it’s not that simple. Cornelius has been part of our lives since we were children.”
“He’s watched us both grow up, and still made the decision to kiss me.”
“Emotions are complicated, which is exactly why you’re so affected by this.”
“For as long as Titus has been leader of the Council Cornelius was right by his side. I always thought it was about power. Knowing what I do now… I’ve tried to stop Titus before, and it never worked. People I cared about died. Unlike him I connect. He doesn’t believe in friends.”
“Reuben didn’t make it any easier, did he?”
“No, he thought I could live a normal life, never once listening to Leonora when she told him to be wary of Titus. We were his children, but Titus didn’t feel anything. Talking about potential marriages for me didn’t help. It simply infuriated Titus.”
“Who would you have chosen?”
“Celeste…”
“Let’s pretend, for a few seconds, you were normal. I know Reuben had a preference for Maximillian, but he wasn’t the only possibility. There was Jonathan too, although even if you weren’t who you are it wouldn’t have been an option.”
“No, he wouldn’t.”
“Unfortunately.”
“Honestly, I don’t know. I never let them get close enough to get to know them. Father tried to convince me it was fine, but my future could never be how he envisioned.”
“Cornelius?”
“Please don’t.”
“Reuben definitely wouldn’t have approved.”
“Even if he did Cornelius is married.”
“That’s not a no, Anne.”
“You want honest, right?” Celeste nodded. “After what happened with Jonathan I shouldn’t even think this, but I’m not going to pretend I’m not attracted to Cornelius, although I don’t know if it’s him or because he reminds me of another Darkholme.”
“One you’d have chosen?”
“Back then I didn’t even think about that possibility. It was one of the lives I worked to not care, which… it led me down some dark paths I wish I’d never walked.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Talking about it helps, a little.”
“What are you going to do about your soulmate?”
“He needs to know.”
“That’s not entirely what I meant, but you are right. It would be best to tell him.” Celeste’s eyes met with Anne’s. “Mother helped me with understanding what the best options might be for someone in your position.”
“Leonora knows?”
“Not everything. Enough, but she’s not going to say anything.”
“After what happened with Cornelius I didn’t really think about it. I should have, but…”
“We have a little time.”
“Barely any. The days are passing quickly.”
“Enough, Anne, and you needed the time to work through it all.”
“Having someone to talk to helps more. Pushing you away was a mistake.”
“I understand the choice. Knowing what I do now… other than learning more about the soul bond how can I help?”
“Celly…”
“Whatever happened before is in the past. You need someone, and I can be that person.”
“Jonathan said you’d forgive me.”
“He was right. Do you miss him?”
“More than I imagined.”
“One way or another we’ll get through this.”
“I can’t convince Titus to make a different decision.”
“This probably isn’t something I should say, but I seriously thought about talking to him. Maybe I could be the one to make him see there are other options. Even though I know better it was tempting.”
“You might have let it get the better of you elsewhere.”
“Do you believe in multiple worlds?”
“Reuben did. It’s not something he ever talked to Titus about, but I overheard a couple of conversations he had with Gregor Tyrell about it. Unlike Marion I think Gregor’s fascinated with Titus.”
They looked at each other again, barely fitting as they sat in a position they once had when they were children.
“I wouldn’t be surprised. Marion and Gregor are almost equal.”
“Marion was Titus’s choice for a reason. He didn’t want to deal with Gregor. The Tyrells have never been a favourite.”
“Let’s be honest – you’re the only person Titus actually likes.”
“Even then I wonder if he likes me, or if the bond is the only thing keeping us together.”
“How about we focus on the bond? Come with me.”
Anne stood, following Celeste through a bookcase into a room that had to be Leonora’s.
“The Embers’ hidden collection of books?”
Celeste nodded. “It’s normally Mother’s domain, but I don’t think she’d mind, as long as you promise me you won’t say anything to Titus.”
“Even if I did Leonora’s wards would stop him. For some reason she’s happy enough to let me enter.”
“You’re trying.”
“With everything that’s happened it doesn’t feel like enough, especially as it’s taken me this long.”
“Anne, we both know that isn’t true – there were other times.”
“Other times I wasn’t strong enough to keep going when one problem stopped me.”
“Unfortunately that problem was Titus.”
“Still…”
“We all have to make decisions, and yours was to wait to fight until you thought you’d truly be able to stop Titus. Now, look at the other bookcase. Between us we should be able to find something.”
Crossing the room, glancing at Celeste as she did, Anne looked at books she knew.
“Leonora has kept everything.”
“What do you mean?”
“At least a few of these were written by the first Embers, back when Titus almost thought of you as allies. Once or twice you were, but mostly the Embers have been good people. Especially when compared to the Lockwoods.”
“Before we knew better.”
“Yes, that’s right. In the end your family made different choices. Titus never forgave you for that.”
“Hence his decision to curse us.”
Eyes on the books, not willing to touch them yet, Anne found herself lost in memories once more, of the Embers who lived and died. There were so many of them.